sick day

I'm sick. Sick as a diseased rat in an exotic climate. Aching limbs, fuggy head, lungs full of a vile and distressingly colourful stuff. But thats probably too much information. I also have a desperate inability to get warm in this city, where central heating is still a fantastic and futuristic concept. Be warm all the time?? Not wear coats inside?? Surely that is the talk of heathens!

To ease my discomfort I decided to spend the day under a blanket on the couch, catching up with my pirate DVD purchases. A few episodes of Deadwood series 3 seemed to do the trick, along with Blood Diamond and Telladega Nights, but when it came to the apparent jewel in my collection things took a turn for the worse.

Digging around at the back of the shelves at my local dodgy DVD purveyor last week, I came across a Japanese movie that should have, by all rights, been the best movie in the world ever. It's name? BLIND BEAST vs KILLER DWARF! I mean, with a name like that it couldn't fail but to be the best movie ever, right? Wrong. It turned out to be a ridiculous detective story that didn't make any sense whatsoever - the two characters that lend their names to the title, the blind beast and killer dwarf, never actually meet each other, never mind have a fight. And, for that matter, the 'blind beast' is just a normal bloke who wears dark glasses, walks hunched over and has hair covering the backs of his hands. It does have a dwarf in though, which is pretty awesome.